Damn you
for making me say and do
so many things
I would never have otherwise
said or done.
Like this.
This card was the only one
among hundreds that didn’t
make me want to vomit.
Kind of like you.
It’s nearly impossible
to find a greeting card for you.
Take that as a compliment.
I thought of so many things
to do for you
that you would’ve loved.
But I didn’t want it to look
like I was trying too hard.
I could never imagine myself
buying cards like this.
Then a funny thing happened.
I met you.
Do you ever get
that nagging sense
that we’re kidding ourselves
to think that we could
ever make it together?
Me neither.
Sometimes, when we’re
walking down the street,
I’ll look at the windows
of the shops as we pass
just to see the reflection
of us walking together.
I’m glad
you feel comfortable
burping and farting
in my presence.
(Sort of glad.)
I know you don’t like
to make a big deal
out of things like this.
So I just got you
this card.
I’m expecting something
to go terribly wrong soon.
Because having you around
is just too perfect.
You mean so much to me…
…that I’m willing to spend
a few whole dollars
on a greeting card.
If I knew exactly what to say…
…then I sure as hell
wouldn’t be giving you
a greeting card.
When I bought this card,
I was feeling good
about our relationship.
But now that you’re reading it,
things might’ve changed.
I just wanted to tell you…
…that I get the feeling that
if I knew you more
I’d like you more
I mean in general
the more I knew you
the more I’d like you
and that’s not something
that happens very often
I think I mean
the knowing and the liking
and the feeling I’ve got.
